Natalie Miller-Moore wonders: After seeing how strong we became together, where is this unifying force going to take us? Or has it faded away?
Posted on June 11, 2003 09:51 PMBy Natalie Miller
210 west Content Editor [send email]
I can't believe what a different place I'm in since 9/11/01 -- that year I was a reporter, and Tuesday was my deadline -- always a hectic day. I had a story about the income tax increase to finish, and a couple of random briefs, etc.
Dan called me on my way to the car and told me just the bare facts: A plane had crashed, etc. But I listened to it unfold on my long commute to work. I was driving under an overpass in the middle of Cleveland when the newsanchor said the building had collapsed. And he was speechless ... and that's when I started to cry. It just seemed like such chaos.
Then I got to work and my editor told me to get out in the community and get some reactions. I really had a hard time trying to distance myself from it. I went to the community center where I knew local safety forces were having a meeting. I got some good quotes from that, and people talked about relatives in New York or their recent visits there. And I went to different restaurants and everyone was completely silent and dazed. And then back to the office to try and write something up ... . So hard to concentrate. And I called people from my beat for reactions, and they were very tentative. By the end of the day, everyone was so drained ... .
Listening to "Stuck in a Moment that We Can't Get Out of" by U2, and watching a man on a highway overpass waving a huge flag with all his might really got to me. It was weird that everyone had grief, even though it didn't happen to them ... it happened to everyone.
Everyone was in shock for a long time. I don't know how many people admitted it, but it was very hard to concentrate on anything. The stages of grief affected everyone, no matter how we tried to shake it -- denial, anger, bargaining, acceptance. The country was energized, then lethargic after we realized that we weren't going to find any more survivors.
I've been trying to avoid reliving it, but maybe this remembrance is healthy. It was probably the biggest event of my lifetime so far. And the intensity of the day was full of terror, panic, concern, anger, sadness and disbelief. Those individual stories are what really get me: the missing people posters and the babies born to parents who died that day. I am proud that we pulled together and have come through with a stronger unity. I hope that this awareness of how we are viewed in the world keeps people interested in national politics and foreign policy and that they become more interested. I try to go with "Let there be peace on earth, and let it begin with me."
Now that it's been two years since the anniversary, my feelings have somewhat changed. Mainly due to the war in Iraq, which feels unsettled to me. What have we accomplished to rid the world and our country of terrorism?
I think there is less immediate fear of terrorist acts, but anyone living near the sniper attacks this spring knows that it's an everpresent danger that doesn't just come from the outside. The orange alerts increase security, but I hope they are used carefully or people will become immune to them.
I think our country has forgotten the unifying forces of the days and months after 9/11. We seem to be more divided and selfish than ever. Will another act of terrorism strengthen our resolve or only divide us further? That will be the legacy of 9/11 yet to be determined.