Dan Nied's Fortress of Weight Loss: Day 35

Turns out I'm not doing so bad

WHAT I ATE TODAY
Here’s the thing about the food journal: I love it, but I hate it. And though I think it is important for you to know what I eat, I also think that it takes absolutely forever to code and add everything up. And sometimes, like tonight, I am quite tired, and I can’t even remember everything.

So here’s the deal. On nights like tonight, I will just run things down and give you a basic overview off the top of my head. I won’t leave anything huge out. If I have a meatball sandwich, you’ll know about it. You’ll know if days are good or not. Likewise, when I am peppy and full of energy, I will gladly run everything down for you complete with portion size and calorie intake. At this point in my knowledge of the diet, it isn’t as important for me to know exactly how many calories I have in one day, so long as I know the range.

So, here is what I ate today: A bowl of Rice Chex (or is it checks? Hmm.), 1 lowfat salami sandwich with orange, another orange, a tiny bag of beef jerky, a big ass salad, a can of turkey chili with two pieces of toast.

Approximate calories: between 1,700 and 2,000. It wasn’t the best day, but again not the worst. Too much sodium, obviously, but I fit it all within the context of what I am trying to do. And really, I’m not gonna worry all that much about sodium, as long as the fat and calories are in line.

THE REAL REASON I BROUGHT YOU HERE TODAY
If you have been reading this for the past month, you’ve certainly shared some very low moments with me. I’ll have to admit that this has been one big manic-depressive project so far. Though I don’t apologize for my mood swings, I do apologize for sometimes being a Grumpy Gus when I screw up. Although, I definitely feel that this works better when I am emotional, and you get to see the failures a little more clearly than the success.

That said, I got up today and had the official weigh in that I pushed back from Sunday. The results…281.8 pounds, a 3.4 pound difference from nine days ago, and a shattering of the weekly two-pound goal.

This might have been the first real revelation for me through this diet. I can now see that, without a doubt, this is working.

Yes, I wasn’t so sure before. No, I don’t really know why. But here we are, 35 days in, and I’ve lost 17.2 pounds. No matter what agony I’ve expressed before, no matter what doubt crept into my head over the last month, it is clear that this is all working out for me.

I’ve made the changes necessary to adjust my weight. I’ve made eating low-fat, low-calorie foods a habit instead of a choice. I wake up in the morning looking forward to a bowl of healthy cereal instead of eggs and sausage, and I come home at night craving a big salad instead of going to Jack in the Box.

For the most part, I go to the gym now without thinking about it. For the most part, I always feel great about it afterwards. Instead of worrying about life over 300 pounds, I am fantasizing about life at 260, 250 and definitely 240…(maybe even 230? Who knows?).

The transformation isn’t nearly complete. I am still not lifting weights, and I do have the occasional urge to binge. But that comes with the territory, right? There is time to work on those things.

It may seem odd that this epiphany occurred to me 17 pounds in, instead of say 10, 20 or 25. But it seems perfectly normal to me. See, for the first three weeks, I was obsessing over the scale. Though the numbers went down overall, they also shot back up too often for my tastes. Likewise, I couldn’t be so sure about the progress I was making because too often I would make choices that may have been fine in the long run, but were bad for me in the short run.

Once I stopped weighing myself every day (or twice a day for that matter), my mind went back to the land of sane people. Now, individual meals don’t mean as much as the whole menu for the week. One elliptical workout doesn’t carry nearly as much importance as the three or four over the course of seven days.

Last week, when I was 285.2 pounds, I could sense the progress. But still, I wasn’t sure. After all, I had bottomed out at 284 a week prior, though that was due to the flu. But in a real week’s time (ok, nine days), I saw actual progress being made. Going from 285.2 to 281.2 is undeniable progress. I now know that if I continue on this path, then my goal will be achieved.

Certainly there are adjustments that will have to be made along the way. After all, I am only a quarter of the way through the process. And every pound is more difficult to lose than the last one. But I sit here today, at my messy desk writing on my old computer monitor and I am working with lower numbers than I was last week.

The 270s are right around the corner, and the 260s aren’t that far behind. I am an optimistic man right now.

35 days, 281.8, 17.4 2 pounds. Not too bad, eh?