Zach Baker may hate the Lakers more than bee stings and mouth kisses from Aunt Connie. And really, who can blame him.
By Zack Baker
210 west Writer [send email]
Forgive me if I choose not to line up in the Los Angeles Lakers parade this
morning. Sure, pundits are back on the bandwagon, talking about the
greatness of a team that 11 months appeared incapable of one loss.
For me however, when Lakers coverage comes on, every three minutes or so, I switch the station.
Uttering the name of a certain shooting guard on trial for rape will result in the same action.
I am sorry, but I hate the Lakers.
OK, hate is a strong word. I don't hate them, I ... well, yeah I hate them.
The Lakers are like the guy in high school who used to shove you
lockers just because they could. They went out with the cheerleaders, but then
stole your girlfriend, again, just because they could.
I hate the idea of them, hate the fact that they play in a town of
so-called celebrities who pretend to love them. We all know Jack Nicholson loves them but he's JACK, so it's cool. But Rob Lowe was at a game last week, being interviewed about something. He pledged his undying love and support to the Lakers, then plugged his TNT original movie.
I guess he's not working for Schwarzenegger anymore then?
Watching a Lakers game is like watching Hollywood Squares. Every once
in a while there is a big star there, but for the most part it's B-level "celebreities"
who just had a pilot canceled on the WB. They know a Lakers game may be
their only real chance to work in television.
But it's more than the celebrities. Ever see a Lakers championship win that
didn't result in a riot?
But I digress.
Sure, they didn't win last year, but that's like Brad Pitt taking a short film vacation after three blockbusters. Now every media outlet in the free world is picking this version of Tinseltown Trash to blow by the Detroit Pistons for this year's NBA crown.
Need another reason to hate the Lakers? Tim Duncan, David Robinson and the San Antonio Spurs won the NBA championship last season. If you listen to many, it was actually the Lakers who lost it.
They tanked. They imploded. The stars were aligned against them. Never
mind that they played the Spurs in the Conference SEMI-FINALS. Hell, in this year's post season, no team has beaten the Lakers in this post season. The Lakers have just "not shown up" a few times. At least according to the media.
To that same Purple and Gold bleeding media, it sometimes seems to no longer be the NBA, it's the Los Angeles Laker traveling road show, with special guest star opponents. The only thing that has kept Laker-mania off the NBA front pages was LeBron James, and the Lakers don't have him, thank goodness.
At least not yet.
The Lakers have, arguably, the two best players in the game in Kobe Bryant and Shaquille O'Neal. They also have one of the greatest coaches of the era in Phil
Jackson. Then, they signed Karl Malone and Gary Payton. I'm not sure they really needed those guys, but what the heck, they had the
money.
I swear, I hate the Lakers.