100 Days

There is no doubt in my mind that this is most difficult part of my journey to day.

Right now it is very easy for me to use my past success to rationalize taking days off. After all, I’ve come this far, right? So what kind of big deal is it if I go out to lunch or have a few bagels as a snack? Well, its kind of a big deal.

Now, the occasional meal off isn’t such a bad thing. Its when that one meal leads to the fuck up of an entire day. That’s the bad part.

That’s what happened Saturday. I was covering an event and, without asking, the concession people just served me up a dish of cherry cobbler. It was delicious, sure. But I wasn’t really planning on having it. I took it to be polite.

And that would have been ok, in my mind. But that led to a trip to Subway for a Spicy Italian. Then later that night I had another big sandwich and gave myself stomach pains this morning.

I managed to get back on track Sunday, having a pretty decent day. But still, unless I can string together a long streak of healthy days, I won’t ever get down to 240. And I very much want to get down to 240.

The biggest worry for me right now is my mental state. My lifestyle has changed a great deal, but I still screw up more than I would like. Also, with a move looming in the next two weeks, and no real idea of what my health options will be in this new city (where will I work out?), I have no clue what the next few months will bring.

But that’s part of it, right? A lifestyle change means incorporating those habits into any typical situation. That’s what I am gonna have to do. And you know, there is no timetable for me to get down to 240, but the most important part is that I see continuous progress in the effort. For the last three weeks, I have shuttled between 280 and 277. I am losing and gaining the same three pounds. That’s not progress, that’s nothing.

But hey, at least I am not going up.