100 Days

What I ate today: Look, I’m getting a little tired of doing the journal. It’s kind of a pain in the ass for me and takes longer to do than writing the actual entry. But I do realize its importance. So here’s the deal: It is still part of this and will show up on most days. However, tonight, my heart just isn’t in it. Sorry. Let’s estimate about 1,500 calories for today.

Exercise: None. We have a small problem here. While I have been working out three days a week lately, I have found it very easy to talk myself out exercise. This is bad. It isn’t a dire situation, but something that needs to be corrected as soon as possible.

News and notes: There are new pictures up on the site. They were taken by coworker Jen, the gray shirt pics are from Tuesday and the black shirt pics are from Wednesday. I need a haircut in both sets. Please leave comments as to how you think I look. I don't notice too much of a difference. Also, I said it earlier, but just a reminder. I will continue this blog until I lose 100 pounds. So it will not end April 14, as was originally scheduled. I figure it will probably go until June.

Here’s a fun game to play when you are done watching South Park on Wednesdays. Watch the first segment of the insipid Mind of Mencia and try to predict the exact time Carlos Mencia says the word “beaner” for the first time. I have played three times and been right each time. Tonight I had 11:35 in the office pool. He almost made it to 11:36, but then brought it home for me with a “beaner” that didn’t even fit into his so called joke. A fan of Carlos Mencia I am not. But the game is so easy, and it makes you very proud when you are right.

So that pizza from yesterday was a bad idea. Actually I don’t know if the pizza itself was a bad idea, but the things I did to it definitely were. Here’s my dirty little secret: I put some extra cheese and pepperoni on that thing. In fact, a good portion of the crust is sitting in my garbage can right now. There isn’t nearly as much cheese left, and I think the extra pepperoni was demolished last night. So perhaps the sheer volume of cheese that I ate last night contributed to today’s couch-inducing stomach pains. Almost certainly it rendered the Pepto Bismol useless.

But it did get me thinking. Last night I talked about the possibility of giving up shitty food altogether. Around noon Wednesday I was certain that it was going to happen. Now, at 11:49 p.m. mountain time, I am thinking that it would be a very good idea to at least try to totally eliminate pizza, burgers, fries and other greasy foods from my life. I shouldn’t be relying on a bottle of Pepto Bismol to get me through a weekend. And for this weight loss to stick, this has to be a complete lifestyle change.

Now, don’t get the wrong idea here. I am not talking about eating 1200 calories a day for the rest of my life. I am saying that pasta, chicken and other less greasy foods need to eventually be a bigger part of my life. My theory, which has been proven by others who have completely changed their eating habits, is that eventually not ever eating shit will become second nature to me. In fact, I can see it already with this quest. Now when I wake up in the morning, I am not thinking about sausage or bacon. I am actually looking forward to two servings of Special K. When I eat like shit, like I did Tuesday, it is a result of a conscious choice I make sometime over the course of a day. It is a decision now, and not a reaction. Also, it has become something that I actually think about, weighing pros and cons and trying to make an informed decision based on long term consequences and short term gratification. So how hard would it be to just give up on pizza and burgers? I don’t think it would be that difficult. There are other options that are just as gratifying.

As I lay on the couch Wednesday afternoon certain that I would soon be dead from stomach trauma, I repeated the phrase “It’s not worth it.” I repeated that phrase because, indeed, it wasn’t worth it to eat that pizza for a half hour and then be disabled for four hours the next day. And maybe those stomach pains wouldn’t have happened without the extra cheese and pepperoni, but I’m glad they did. Those pains made me think about the long term consequences for my stomach if I keep up that sort of thing. So right now I think the best thing for me would be to stay away from certain pain and remember that cheating doesn’t mean binge eating.

This is a learning experience for me, so I guess its time I get to learning.

This is one of my old shirts that now fits me! I love this shirt. My ex girlfriend told me I wasn't allowed to wear it because I looked to hot in it. I think she was blowing smoke up my ass, but you can be the judge.