100 Days

What I ate today

Breakfast (9 a.m.)
3 servings of Special K
2 servings of skim milk
Calories: 500 (ouch)
Fat: 0 grams (yeah!)

Lunch (1 p.m.)
1 Healthy Choice smoked sausage
2 ounces of roast beef
Calories: 380
Fat: 10.75 grams

Snack (4 p.m.)
1 non candy apple
Calories: 80
Fat: 0 grams

Dinner (7:15 p.m.)
1 Foot long Subway club
Calories: 640
Fat: 12 grams

Snack (10 p.m.)
2 servings of baby carrots
Calories: 70
Fat: 0 grams

Total calories: 1,670
Total fat: 22.75 grams

Exercise: 40 minutes on elliptical machine. However, no lifting, which makes me kind of sad.

Picture update: My former roommate Cameron sent over a photo taken a few years ago where I look downright sickly. It’s up on the site now and it is definitely worth checking out because I am thin, tan and unbelievably fucking fuckable.

News: I went to exercise at 6 p.m. tonight. After consuming over 1,000 calories for the day and several ounces of water, I weighed in at 321. That is pretty fucking sweet. Four pounds over the last two days, give or take certain variables. I’m pumped, ready to go. So what did I do after I worked out? I decided to forego my planned chicken topped salad and head to Subway. I am so easily convinced.

Of course that gave me a chance to sort of flirt with the cute new girl at Subway. However, the problem in this town is that, when you see an attractive girl, you have no idea if she is 16 or 24. There’s just no way to tell. But considering that this girl doesn’t have any visible tattoos, has all her teeth and seems to not be crazy, I have to guess she isn’t jaded enough to be over 18. So the olive party I suggested to her would probably have to be chaperoned.

I guess the one thing I regret about this blog, at least for all the readers, is that there isn’t a love interest. Wouldn’t it be great if, while I was losing weight, I was slowly working up the courage to ask some dream girl out? Wouldn’t you be 10 times more excited to read this every day? When I finally asked her out, it would be like Rachel kissing Ross all over again.

Look, people, I am trying hard to find this girl, but she may not exist in this town. We do have a somewhat attractive new girl at work now. She was a prime candidate for awhile, but I found out today she is married. Like I couldn’t see that one from miles away.

Oh well, there is still time, and 50 pounds left to go. So maybe she will pop up. Keep your fingers crossed. It would be really nice to have a subplot for you.

So here I am at the halfway point, officially. In case you missed the memo, the blog will be extended until I lose 100 pounds. So I could, conceivably, be posting until I am 50 years old. And by that time, the desire to lose 100 pounds will probably be long gone, so I’ll be complaining about my state senator and my new insurance plan. Hopefully, though, the 100 pounds will take about 140 days or so (just considering 70 days to lose 50. I know it will probably be longer than that, but my math skills are limited.) So that would take us into mid-June.

But we are halfway there. I am pretty damn proud of that. And the next 50 pounds will be the fun 50. This last 50 was just to get the ball rolling. It took me from really fat to fat. Now I get to go from fat to not so fat to super not so fat to somewhat in shape in the next 50. Eventually, I am hoping to get down to full blown attractive. That’s when the ladies will come. I know it, you know it, the American people know it.

But thanks for sticking with me this far. And if you are just joining the ride, then feel free to hop on and watch me wilt away to nothing.