100 Days

Alright, definitely no food journal today. It would be nearly impossible to figure out everything I ate. I finally figured out how to update this blog from my hotel room here in Wyoming. I haven't totally figured out the keyboard for this laptop, which isn't mine, and I am way too tired to proofread as well as I should, so bear with me.

How is this whole diet thing going here in Wyoming? If you don't want me to be honest, it is going well. If you do, however, wish to hear an honest answer, then it is going well only because I haven't totally given up on the diet.

When I say I haven't given up on the diet, I mean that I won't be giving up once I get back to Colorado. As for the first two days I've been here, it hasn't exactly been Healthfest USA. I haven't worked out and I haven't eaten very well at all.

There are reasons, too. Although none of the reasons really serve as good excuses. My reason for not working out is simple. Time. Most of the time I am following around the basketball team. Today I went to breakfast, then went to the shootaround, then had to line up a freelance photographer, then laid down for a few minutes (because I was up writing articles until 3 a.m. the night before) and then I had to go to tonight's game. After that I came home and wrote, watched film with the coaches and now, at 2 a.m. am settling down to do this entry. So that is why I didn't work out. However, I am going to walk tomorrow, even if it is just up and down the street looking for a CD to buy for the ride home Thursday.

As for the eating, it is pretty simple: I haven't tried that hard to eat well. There have been a few times where I was put in a bad situation, but I guess the only frustrating thing is that, with a little effort, I could be doing really well on this trip. There are two Subways in this town and the buffet at the games was, get this, stocked with six inch Subway sandwiches yesterday. That was nice. I haven't gone completely crazy, though. I woke up today and had two bowls of Special K from the breakfast buffet. And I easily resisted the main courses on the game buffet the last two days: First smoked sausages and hot dogs and then barbecue beef. But there were other things that got me. I gave in to a sweet tooth today and had some rice crispies treats and I went to Subway yesterday and got a spicy itallian, my real favorite sandwich there.

I went to lunch with the coaches today and that ended with a lot of calories and fat. I tried a little bit. I got fajitas. But then someone ordered nachos for the table and the coaches swore that the bread was big time. So I has some bread and it turned out it was deep fried and garnished with some very sugary substances. It was amazing.

I have been thinking a lot about the diet here. I am at a point right now where there is a noticeable difference in the way I look. However, I don't look the way I want to. And I have been wondering why I don't feel all that guilty about essentially taking the last two days off.

Obviously I'm not improving the process by taking these days off, so why am I not worried? It hit me today as I was driving back to the arena. What I have done in the last 60 days is create new habits. I am 100 percent sure that once I return, I will go right back to the lifestyle I have been living for the last two months. Before, once I temporarily went off a diet I was never coming back. That dieting episode was dead. But now I feel like I am a healthy person simply enjoying certain foods when I have the chance. There is no question in my mind that I will get down to 270 in the near future. And I know that I will resume the workout routine Friday.

And what made the previous screw ups so frustrating was that A) I was yet to prove to myself that I could really turn my habits around and B) the 100 days theory gave me absolutely no room for error. Now I know that I have turned things around and my goals are very clear right now. I am focused on this weight loss, even as I eat deep fried bread. I know an isolated incident when I see it. This was one. My mind is clear on this subject, my heart is aimed directly at the goal.

Of course, that doesn't mean it is ok for me to just go off the diet until I get home. I think it would be a very good goal for me to eat healthy on Wednesday and Thursday. I have to admit that I was kind of sluggish after lunch today and I don't really like feeling that way. Of course, that is the exact way I felt every day of 2005. I guess sometimes it might be good to remember how shitty food makes you feel.

I am very confident right now, so I hope you guys aren't too disapointed in my eating over the last two days. I will try to do an entry for Thursday, but I can't guarentee anything right now.